Do You Ever Rethink Your Amazon Sample Pages?

I've been known to pull up my samples on their Amazon book pages and try to get inside the mind of a potential buyer. Because an author's brain plays tricks on them, it's very hard to be objective about it. "Well, wait 'til they get to the good part." But if there isn't a "good part" in the sample, a reader's never going to get that far.

When I was editing the manuscript for Running From Herself, I struggled with the opening a lot. Actually, I struggled with it even before I began editing. Then finally I remembered the mantra, start with the inciting incident. But that wasn't the total solution. The real inciting incident was Leah's band breaking up, which caused her to take to the road in search of a new life. At first I'd written pages of exposition that showed the band's struggles and the members' increasing antipathy toward each other. I mean long exposition. There was a whole scene about traveling to play at a small town square dance their hapless manager had booked them for, and all the catastrophes that happened during that gig--in minute detail. That's the hazard of discovery writing. It takes time to get a feel for the story. Time to figure out what's important and what is simply self-indulgent. 

Then I considered the (hypothetical) reader. They'd be bored to tears.  

Eventually I deleted all of it.

In the end I began the story with Leah driving a deserted highway late at night, lost, hypnotized by the white lines. Would that opening be intriguing? Don't know. Still don't know, but it at least plants a question in the reader's mind.

(All the band stuff eventually got woven back in, sans the square dance sequence, through short flashbacks and through a clever, to me, scene of Leah watching a cringe video of the band's final breakup.) 

If I'm thinking about buying a book, I always read the free sample. Even if it's a biography/autobiography, I need a sense of the writer's style. I'm a big fan of the genre, but entertainers who actually write their own life stories often should have turned the job over to an actual writer. John Fogerty is one bad example. Jimmy Webb is the worst by far. By contrast, Phil Collins is one of the good ones.

I've also sampled pages of books for research purposes. One of the most blatant mistakes I came across was an entire sample that consisted of a list of the writer's other books, a page of reviews, author notes--and then page after page of the same info repeated. The sample never actually gets to the story. I don't know if it was a mistake or not, but this consisted of 118 sample pages. Maybe she already has a big fan base; still, that's just arrogance.  

Another irritation for me is prologues. Unfortunately, I estimate that 80% of first novels begin with a prologue. Yes, it's a rookie mistake, but that doesn't make it any better. A prologue sample is an immediate turnoff for me. 

(Don't shoot me, but Michener's novel, Centennial, struck me the same way. I slogged through chapters and chapters about a beaver family, among other animal/plant stories, because I'd watched the TV movie and I knew the story eventually got good. Never finished reading that book. Luckily for James, his publisher didn't feel obliged to post a sample.)

So, back to my samples. Well, it's been a while since I checked, but it seems that only one of my books actually contains a free sample. Obviously, I'll need to contact KDP about this, but my shoulders sag just contemplating that. I strike out anytime I contact any company about anything. The thing is, the samples used to be there. 

But at least Running From Herself's sample still exists. The first page grounds the reader, in my opinion. Sets the scene. I'm not great at description, but I did okay. The third paragraph recounts a conversation Leah had with her mom that reveals her sense of hopelessness and briefly explains why she's taken to the road. I put a ton of work and thought into every line and sequence, and it shows. I worked harder on this book than on any of my others. I avoided over-explaining.

I'm not crazy about the sample going almost all the way through Chapter 7. Doesn't that seem like a lot? A potential reader can get a feel for the writing much sooner than that. Apparently the default preview is 10%. Maybe Amazon counts on the reader getting hooked, as if Amazon actually cares, which it doesn't. It doesn't care about anything we indie authors do, especially making our books visible. 

It's not as if you're going to rewrite your book's opening based on its Amazon sample, but authors would do well to ask themselves important questions about it. Face it; it's cover, blurb, sample. 

Those are our three chances to impress.