Disappointing Interview Questions

After reading the comments under Writer Beware's article about Reader's House literary magazine, I was rather pumped to receive my list of interview questions. As I noted in my original post, yes, I'm aware that no actual reader buys this magazine and that its purpose is to convince indie authors to pay for print placement--which I'm obviously not going to do--but doing an interview is free, it gets included in the online edition, and it's just one additional nugget an author can use for publicity.

One commenter wrote:

"I...answered their questions (which were well thought out and interesting)..." 

Here's another:

"I too received this pitch and spent a good deal of time answering the questions which were actually very interesting. Clearly someone had done a deep dive into my website and it was fun to answer the questions." 

Really? 

I think the questions suck. 

I'm aware that they scanned my website, since they know I'm a songwriter, but there's only one question relating to that, and the rest of the questions are generic, vanilla.

And to be crystal clear: I'm not interested in talking to anyone about my songwriting and how it relates to my fiction. It doesn't! It's like asking an author, "I see you're a janitor. Can you describe how mopping floors ties into your novel writing?" It's not the first time I've been asked this question, and it's impossible to answer without sounding grumpy. I can definitely cite the differences, but similarities don't exist. It's my own fault for including songwriting in my author bio, but any indie author will tell you that it's a struggle to find anything semi-interesting to say about oneself. Writing books is apparently not enough.

I've been presented with ten questions in all, but the majority of them are along the lines of, "How do you..." I don't know how I...I just do it. This is the trouble with a non-writer asking a writer questions. They don't know what to ask. But this outfit's been around for a bit (as far as I know), so they should, based on experience alone, be able to ask pertinent questions.

A non-creative person tends to focus on process. In my worklife, I, too, had to focus on process. There was a right way to solve problems; specific steps that needed to be taken. That's true for almost every job (one hopes). Artistry is different. When I was writing Running From Herself, and every other story I've written, the only "process" thought I had was, "Should this event follow this one?" I had to get the flow right; the procession. Otherwise, the story would be a jumbled mess. As far as the words themselves, how do I convey to anyone how my mind works? I don't even know.

Another question was, "Which of your characters is most like your own voice or experience?" Well, they're ALL like my voice, because I'm writing them. Hello? As for my experience, do you know how dull my stories would be if I wrote about my own experiences? This is why I write fiction. Again, a non-creative person asking an artist questions. I didn't write a memoir. It's as if these questioners don't possess an imagination, and therefore, can't relate to someone who does. Do they ask sci fi writers which planets they've visited? Or fantasy writers what it's like to ride a dragon?

Don't get me wrong; all ten questions aren't bad, per se. Perhaps I should describe them as uninteresting. If an interviewer is going to ask every single author the same questions, save one individualized one, he/she is going to get roughly the same responses. How can that be interesting to the (non-existent, in this case) reader? 

There is also a 900-word limit, which averages out to ninety words per question. I probably won't need to use that many. I'll do my best to come across as...personable? Engaging? "Funny", my fallback, would probably be a stretch, and inadvisable.

I'll just choose to look at this exercise as practice. For when I hit the big time. 😜