My Writing Journey (Long Journey, Long Post)

I'd been blogging like a maniac, starting in 2006. Once my very first blog got rolling, I felt compelled to publish at least one post a week, often more. If I was to look back at some of those early posts, I'm sure the writing would embarrass me, but all writers have to start somewhere. My one or two weekly posts became kind of challenging after so many years. I began straining for ideas, and at around the seven-year mark I realized I had begun repeating myself. (There were so many postings, I forgot about most of them.) And after veering away from the topic of music and delving into personal memories, I decided I wanted to write a book about my life.

For a first effort, my memoir turned out pretty well. It was, admittedly, far shorter than a "normal" book, but I had no idea how many words a book should contain, so I just wrote until I had no more to say. I hired a formatter and I used a photo from my personal collection for the cover. I even managed to sell a few copies, very few, but the fact that I sold any is amazing, seeing as how clueless I was about how hard it is to sell books. (Maybe ignorance truly is bliss.)

I wisely never expected anything to come of that memoir, and I soon forgot about it and went back to blogging. Then around 2015 I decided I wanted to write fiction. I viewed it as a challenge, but I had no idea just how challenging it would be. By then I'd found a writer's forum and learned a few tidbits about how to submit to literary agents, what a query letter was, the expected word counts for various genres. At that time, the consensus was that for women's fiction, 80,000 words was the sweet spot. I didn't consciously choose women's fiction for my (forthcoming) story, but it didn't seem to fit anywhere else, and it definitely had a female protagonist.

So, here is how my writing journey began and the hard lessons I learned:

Once in a Blue Moon (published in 2016)

No, it didn't have a title 'til it was finished, and while the phrase is overused in fiction (I've since found), it fits the story.

Never once--not once--did I ever consider outlining. For this first novel, I only had a vague premise; a present-day woman is suddenly transported back in time and assumes the persona of her grandmother. The setting was drawn from my memories of my childhood farm home, because I apparently didn't trust that I possessed any imagination.

Pretty quickly, I encountered a problem--how in the world would I make this story add up to 80,000 words? Even after expanding it to feature three protagonists, Jemma, Maggie, and Beth (grandmother, mother, and daughter), I struggled to stretch it to the required word count. This (of course) meant that the story ultimately ended up with too much filler. I painfully recall a long passage in which Beth and her best friend just walked around talking, talking, talking. Compelling!

Nevertheless, I pondered the story a lot while I was writing it. I took long walks through a park every day on my lunch break and brainstormed scenes, which I suppose could loosely be described as "outlining", although I think of outlining as something that's done before a single word is written.

Once the manuscript was finished and "edited"-- self-edited as much as I possessed the knowledge to do--I began compiling my list of literary agents and composing my query letter. I wasn't completely confident that my story could pass muster, if I'm being totally honest, but I felt that it was good enough to land an agent. Turns out it wasn't.

The Good: No matter what route I took to do it, I did it; I wrote an entire novel. I would not be embarrassed to go back and read it. Parts of it are quite good. Also good is that I stuck with it, no matter how difficult it became at times. 

The Not-So-Good: It wasn't good enough. It wasn't publish-worthy. Also not good is that I had no idea how to structure a novel to turn it into a story readers would want to keep reading. I spent more time learning how to query agents than I did learning about storytelling.

Lessons Learned: Every author has to start somewhere. The book's failure doesn't mean I didn't learn, even if that learning involved what not to do. Writing a novel is an intricate jigsaw puzzle. A writer has to be able to piece the whole thing together; not just half of it, to create a beautiful picture. I had much left to master, but I'd at least taken a step on that journey.

 

Radio Crazy (published in 2019? Now delisted and revised as the novella, Whispers in the Dark ) 

Progress doesn't always travel in a straight line. While I absolutely did absorb some lessons from writing that first novel, I didn't absorb enough. I was excited to embark on Radio Crazy; I had a good premise in mind--a woman who survived an attack by killing her attacker, then fled to a small town and changed her identity to avoid being charged in his death. The main character becoming a late-night disc jockey allowed me to incorporate music (my specialty) into the plot. 

I felt far more confident writing this manuscript than I did with the first one, and reaching the word count goal was easier. Once again, I lined up my list of literary agents and began sending query letters. As confident as I was, once I exhausted my agent list, I tried small publishing houses and finally got a single request for the full manuscript.

The woman's ultimate rejection was brutal; soul-crushing. I checked my email folder once a while back to see if I'd saved it, but it's gone. Not that I don't still remember what she said. She communicated a seething hatred for not the story so much as the way I wrote the story. I particularly remember the words, "skimming" and "flashbacks". Also, that my main character was "unlikable".

In hindsight, writing Once in a Blue Moon was easier in the aspect that it was really three different stories combined, whereas Radio Crazy was almost half flashbacks. Naively, at the time I was writing it, I was sure that the flashbacks were needed in order to explain all the present-day events. Too, I learned from browsing that writer's forum that in order to avoid "writing short", one should always include a subplot. Well, Radio Crazy ended up with at least three loosely defined subplots, none of which I remember as being interesting. 

The Good: the story's premise 

The Not-So-Good: everything else

Lessons Learned: Never, ever, rely on flashbacks to tell a story. Also, subplots reek. And while I can appreciate a sarcastic MC with good reason to behave that way, considering all she's gone through, no reader wants to read about someone they don't like. A main character has to be relatable. 

The final lesson I learned is that I handle rejection very poorly. That woman's words threw me into a tailspin, and I gave up writing for a long time. Years later, I understand that she did me a HUGE favor by being honest. All those other "not for me" form rejections weren't helpful at all. It was easy to blame those agents' lack of discernment, when in fact it was me. I perhaps should have also learned the importance of having beta readers, but I have never and still will never go that route, because I'm too over-the-top sensitive. It's an ingrained flaw I've given up trying to shake. It is what it is.

 

The Apple, now retitled What We Conceal (published in 2021) 

Much as I vowed to give up writing for good, I couldn't do it. The Apple, a title I chose based on the saying, "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree", focused on a woman who worked as a highly regarded nursing home director by day and a white collar online criminal by night. She grew up poor with a brother and a sister, and her father was a small-time criminal who was murdered the night of his and his wife's fortieth wedding anniversary party.

This novel was much better than Once in a Blue Moon and FAR better than Radio Crazy. I rejected the age-old advice about subplots and focused solely on the main story. The primary mystery was "who killed Dad?", which allowed me to examine the other family members' lives, and as I was writing it, I still hadn't decided who'd done it.  

I discovered that writing was becoming much easier and more "logical", one might say--not disjointed, but possessing a flow. A hint of proper story structure was starting to blossom. There still were a few flashbacks, but none of them went on for pages and pages, and I slotted them in only to clarify motivation.

The Apple (which in my head I will always call it) was the last book I queried. No one was interested. And yes, I became disillusioned and stopped writing for months.

The Good: I was starting to catch onto how to write a proper story.

The Not-So-Good: I gave up the dream of being trade published (which isn't necessarily a bad thing). One might say that three novels being rejected is not a good barometer of things to come, but it's pretty damn good. Even with The Apple being the best of the lot, agents weren't looking for the type of stories I wrote, instead focusing on the latest political and sociological buzz words. I was careful never to give away my age when I queried, but they all probably had me pegged anyway,

Lessons Learned:  I still hadn't conquered the elusive writing game. If I was to rewrite it, I'd tighten some things up and probably omit some scenes entirely. Plus, novel writing wasn't my forte. It was still a struggle to hit the magic word count, and it felt a bit like cheating when I deliberately set out to stretch the narrative. I learned that I still wasn't a confident writer.

 

New Kaitlyn (published in 2022) 

New Kaitlyn was my revenge novella. I really was going to stop writing for good after The Apple's failure to catch on. Really. For sure this time. But then I couldn't help myself. I needed to write. But this time I set out to impress no one but myself. And I wasn't going to write a novel, just a story. The story would go on as long as it needed to, and then it would end. No agonizing over somebody else's expectations and requirements. I was writing again because I wanted to; not for any other reason. 

With New Kaitlyn (odd fact) the cover and the title came first. My free trial of Canva was ending and I wanted to create one more book cover, even though I had no book to go with it. So I found an image I liked and slapped a title on it. Oops. Now I had no choice but to write the story. This one was straightforward. Kaitlyn was sick of her dead-end life and her dead-end job, so when she saw an internal posting for a supervisor at a newly formed company branch, she applied and was chosen. Thus, she moved to a really small town in South Dakota called Wellspring. (All my town names, by the way, are made up.) She had to start from scratch--the "office" was a mess of leftover detritus from the previous occupant, and she only had a couple of days to fix it up. In the course of getting to know her new town, she met some quirky characters and she fell in love with a man who was already engaged--to one of her new employees. 

Anyway, the story proceeded in a straight line; no detours, and I knew the story was done when it was done. That's it. The End. It came out to only 104 pages in the end, compared to The Apple's 305 pages. I didn't even know how to classify it, but after some research, I deduced that it was a novella. I published it, and satisfied with the writing process, I decided novellas were the way to go.

The Good: I sometime later discovered by accident that not only had one person purchased New Kaitlyn, but they'd left a very nice review. I still didn't even know that marketing was a thing, so that person found the book organically. That review was the impetus I needed to keep writing.

The Not-So-Good: Well, it only ever sold eight copies, but again, I never promoted it, either. Not that promotion would have made much of a difference. It's a novella. No one wants novellas.

Lessons Learned: My writing was getting better and better, and writing novellas freed me up to write what and how I wanted. I completely homed in on the main (only) plot.

The two biggest takeaways, though, were finding how much I loved creating quirky supporting characters (and how good I was at doing it) and that writing in first person, as opposed to third, was the magic I never knew I needed to find. Writing in first person was a revelation. I could really get inside the main character, which made the writing "closer", more intimate. 

 

Find My Way Home (published in 2022)   

As much as I scorn outlining, I still need some vague idea of a main character, at the very least, before I embark on a story, if not an actual theme. My husband and I were watching something, a documentary perhaps, that talked about the moon landing in 1969 and I thought back to the teenager I was back then. I was completely disinterested in the moon landing, as opposed to pretty much everyone else in the world, but as I said, I was a teenager. That remembrance led me to write Find My Way Home. Sabrina's alcoholic father was looking forward to watching the moon landing on TV with her that night, but instead she accepted a blind date, and then she impulsively took off with the guy. (It was the sixties, after all.) The story follows the subsequent years of her life and her sorrow that her family never once tried to find her.

The Good: The first few chapters, per se (a novella actually doesn't have chapters) were well written and interesting. And the stroll through history was fun.

The Not-So-Good: Of all my eleven (or twelve, if we're being technical) books, Find My Way Home is my least favorite. It only managed to sell eight copies, and it got one two-star rating (no accompanying review, thank God). 

Lessons Learned: Sometimes an idea doesn't pan out. Somewhere along the way, I ran out of things for Sabrina to do or to encounter, and the story fizzled. Just because one has a flash of an idea, they aren't forced to act on it. It's okay to abandon a manuscript.

 

Shadow Song (published in 2023) 

Shadow Song was my comeback after a bad novella. It's still a sentimental favorite. The story began like every other, with a woman who needed to find a new path. Ashley's job was eliminated when a corporation bought out her company, and she refused to move to another town and leave her recently widowed father alone. That led her to a job at a nearby lake resort, where she thought she was being hired as a sidewalk portrait artist. Absurdly, she found on her first day that she'd been hired as the supervisor of a group of carnival ride operators.

Then one night she literally stumbles over the body of her boss in the woods.

The Good: Pretty much everything. The story combined absurdity with crime, false charges, and even a touch of humor. I loved being able to incorporate my sense of humor into a story, something I'd refrained from doing in all my previous works. I'd previously straitjacketed myself and stuffed down one of the true facets of myself, because writing, you know, is super serious.

The Not-So-Good: I can't think of anything. 

Lessons Learned: Find your voice, dammit! Set it free! Who or what are you afraid of? That people won't like you? Strangers don't like you anyway; they don't even know you exist.

 

Bad Blood (published in 2023) 

A distant relative of mine is a true-life con man. He volunteered to "help" his elderly mother by picking up her groceries, so off he went with her debit card--and he practically drained her bank account dry. I was thinking about him when I got the idea to write Bad Blood. I'm not convinced that the man Vanessa's brother is modeled after is a true sociopath, but her brother is. When Vanessa's dying mother wills her the house and insists that she let her brother live there, it's only a matter of time before things combust, literally. He sets the house ablaze, even while assuming Vanessa is there. But instead of her being killed, he is. So they tell her.

The Good: Bad Blood was the closest I ever came to writing suspense. And I pulled it off well. (Needless to say, this novella has no humor.) I'm also fond of the ending. After all the ways Vanessa's brother tried to destroy her, she's not letting bygones be bygones. That's real; not a fairy tale happily ever after.

The Not-So-Good: I think this one sold even fewer copies than Find My Way Home. I don't know if that's because of the title or the blurb, or maybe I simply miscategorized it. I might try sticking it in different categories sometime, just out of curiosity. 

Lessons Learned: I'm not stuck doing the same thing over and over. I'm able to write a story with humor, then turn around and write suspense (or "sort of" suspense). I like having a variety of tools in my toolbox.

 

The Diner Girl (published in 2023)  

Bad title, but I had AI help me with it, since I couldn't come up with anything. With The Diner Girl, I went back to the small town setting. The main character, Carrie, is an orphan (aww). Sometimes I just don't want to deal with parents in a story, because that's not what the plot is about. Plus, this allowed me to create evil Aunt Celia, who Carrie is forced to live with after her parents die. This novella isn't too heavy. Sure, Carrie has her challenges, but they're mostly challenges of the heart. Maybe I needed a break from sociopathic brothers. One reviewer called it "sweet". 

The Good: Readers seemed to like it. It averages 4.2 stars.

The Not-So-Good: It is what it is; nothing world-shattering. Maybe that's enough.

Lessons Learned: Sometimes a nice little story is just a nice little story. A writer doesn't always need to strain to impart, well, anything. 

Lies and Love (published in 2024)

Honestly, I wanted to center a story around Mount Rushmore. Why? I suppose because of my fondness for the Black Hills of South Dakota, and because my stories had been circling around the three or four-state area near me, and I hadn't written about South Dakota since New Kaitlyn. (I like to promote the Upper Midwest, which rarely gets any love or attention.) There's a little tourist town quite nearby the monument, and I used it for my fictional town. I thought of the many little souvenir shops there, and decided that my main character was going to be forced (out of duty) to return and run the shop that had been in her family for three generations. Once back home, she falls for a "mysterious stranger". That's pretty much it, except for all the complications that ensue.

Lies and Love was the first time I solicited ARC readers, and my mistake was getting them from Goodreads. Along with Shadow Song, this novella is one of my best. The story simply flows. But Goodreads reviewers are jerks, so the book's average rating is only 3.6, despite its other five and four-star reviews.

The Good: The book is very well written and the plot is interesting.

The Not-So-Good: It's not sold well, despite dipping my toe in the waters of paid promotions, but it's a novella. Did I mention that no one wants novellas?  

Lessons Learned: Don't get ARC readers from Goodreads. (As you will read below, I didn't learn that lesson well enough at first.)

 

Second Chance (published in 2024, now delisted and reworked as...well, you'll read about that below.)

This novella had a great premise. Leah quits her small-town band after a big blowup and takes to the road with no destination in mind. She's done with music--period. She'd spent ten years with the band, not to mention all the little competitions and jamborees her mom chauffeured her to when she was growing up. Exhausted from driving, she ends up in another tiny town (aren't they all?) in Wyoming called Chance. Despite her lack of job skills, the kindly hotel manager secures her a job waitressing at the local bar. 

There she falls in love with the local singer, but he breaks it off with her after he learns a secret she's withheld from him. But eventually they get back together and live happily ever after.

Did you spot the problem? 

The first half of the story is great, but then it dwindles to....yawn. Great premise; horrible execution.

The Good: Awesome start, great supporting characters, top-notch writing. 

The Not-So-Good: Everything after the awesome start.

Lessons Learned: Never publish a book you have misgivings about, just to say you did it. Take pride in your work, for God's sake. I also learned that nothing is unsalvageable; well, almost nothing, if one cares enough to try.  

 

Inn Dreams (published in 2024) 

When a few readers of Lies and Love remarked that they wished the story was longer (well, what they actually said was that it felt "too abrupt"), I approached Inn Dreams with the goal of writing a long novella. In fact, I had it almost finished, then decided to add a whole other complication, which turned the story into something completely different. 

The idea for Inn Dreams resulted from watching a renovation series about old roadside motels. I also have quite a history with mom-and-pop motels in real life. So, Karen Grace sets out to find an old inn she can refurbish, using her small inheritance. This was a fun one to write. I detailed her clumsy, clueless efforts in remodeling, which became even more of a one-woman undertaking after she ran out of money. Then once I threw in a saboteur, things got even more interesting. I was quite proud of the finished product.

The Good: The plot. Also conquering the challenge of "filling out" a story more than I had in the past. 

The Not-So-Good: A couple of Goodreads ARC readers completely deflated my pride in the story. One wrote in her review that I apparently didn't understand "big words", and that she was a teacher, so she knew I was a poseur. WTF? Her review got even worse, but I'm not going to rehash it all now. So, again despite my four and five-star reviews, a couple of assholes killed the book's rating.

Lessons Learned: Don't get ARC readers from Goodreads. I mean it this time. As a matter of fact, I never solicited ARC readers again--from anywhere--and if I ever write another book, I still won't.

 

Running From Herself (published in 2025) 

Leah quits her small-town band after a big blowup and takes to the road with no destination in mind. She's done with music--period. She'd spent ten years with the band, not to mention all the little competitions and jamborees her mom chauffeured her to when she was growing up. Exhausted from driving, she ends up in another tiny town (aren't they all?) in Wyoming called Chance. Despite her lack of job skills, the kindly hotel manager secures her a job waitressing at the local bar. 

There she falls in love with the local singer, but he breaks it off with her after he learns a secret she's withheld from him. 

Wait! This sounds familiar!

Yes, that's right. The novella Second Chance became the big, fat novel, Running From Herself. This time, Leah and Jared don't get back together (screw him-- kidding). Instead, when he decides to disband his group and the Chance-It saloon starts to go belly-up, she picks up where Jared left off. And that's when she's discovered by a Nashville A&R guy. 

Much better, don't you think?

Yep, this book is the one. It's pretty great. I love, love this novel. This is the way to go out. I don't plan to write again, so this one is a wonderful swan song.

The Good: After writing three "not ideal" novels, I gave up on writing them and swiveled to novellas. But I was ready to try once more. While novellas are losers, money-wise, I learned so much about writing--a shit-ton about writing. Those novellas didn't adhere to a pat formula; the various plots were all over the place. That, too, was enlightening. I gained confidence and I knew I could pull off a full-length novel.

The Not-So-Good: I promoted the shit out of this book, and while over a thousand people grabbed it when I offered it for free, it's still only sold 36 copies. On the plus side, I've gotten a decent number of Kindle Unlimited reads. I wanted so badly for people to read this book, but nothing I tried has worked. (And trust me; I really tried.)

Lessons Learned: I'm a helluva writer, if I do say so myself. I also learned that perhaps the theme doesn't resonate with many people, but that's out of my hands. I wrote this book for me, the way I wanted to write it. Yep, I wish more people would read it, but I'm still happy.   

 

I did this post mainly to capture a retrospective of my work for posterity. If you managed to read the whole thing, kudos! And thanks! And I did learn; I learned a lot. Sometimes it's nice to acknowledge one's progress.