A Hill I'm Willing to Die On ~ No Newsletters!

Crazy ideas catch on all the time. I mean, truly demented ideas. There are always people willing to believe them, even with all evidence to the contrary. "What the hell, man? You don't believe the moon landing was created on a soundstage? Neanderthal!"

Then there are people like me.

Let's talk about putting the cart before the horse, shall we? In order to get people to sign up for your newsletter, they first need to be fans of your work. Except if no one buys your work, what is their fandom based on? A pretty Instagram post? 

"No, no! You gotta offer 'em something, silly! A reader magnet!"

Just spitballing here, but what if I offer them an actual magnet? Would that work? They could stick it on their refrigerator. I could make a pretty post on Instagram advertising it. 

Like all authors, I have a newsletter signup form on my author page, but if anyone should accidentally stumble upon it and type in their email address, they'll be waiting a long time to receive their first issue.

I've done all the research ~ tons of research regarding what content to include in my newsletter, and I've tried every bit of advice: giveaways, quizzes, slices of life related to my latest book, recommendations, cover reveals; you name it. One time (one time!) someone engaged with me, so she got the free book (I was giving away three copies). I had to actually make up two other first names for my next newsletter, where I announced the "winners", just so I wouldn't look like the complete loser I was.

It's not as if I haven't accumulated subscribers (and no, I didn't pay to get them), but the signups were all transactional. The largest group I obtained had to sign up to get their free ARC copy, and the other group had entered a contest to win 20 free books by various authors plus a Kindle, and each newsletter they signed up for gave them an additional entry. (I'd sure love to see those other authors' newsletters.) 

No, I've never signed on with StoryOrigin or any of those other sites that promote newsletter signups. First I'd need that dreaded magnet, and I'm fresh out of ideas, and it's a vicious circle anyway. People sign up for the free thing, and that's all they want. Supposedly an author can participate in newsletter swaps, which I guess would provide me with content for my newsletter, since I'd be pushing someone else's work for a change. But if no one has ever bought a book of mine from my own newsletter, why would they buy one off someone else's? 

I love writing, so a newsletter should come naturally to me, but when I stare at that blank template, that's what I become ~ blank. If anyone wants to read something interesting from me, pick up one of my books. (Oh, wait; they don't do that, either.)

Any indie authors out there with thriving newsletters: If you're reading this, send me a link to yours. I promise I won't just use it for research and I won't unsubscribe. I just, one time, want to see a newsletter that actually produces results.